He gazes longingly at you, remembers your coffee order, wears that jacket you bought him, and keeps his stuff at your place. But he never d...
He gazes longingly at you, remembers your coffee order, wears that jacket you bought him, and keeps his stuff at your place. But he never drops the L-word! What is UP with that?
Also, is he still texting that woman he knew from the fitness bootcampsix months ago? That’s starting to grate on you, isn’t it? |
| How Can I Know If He Loves Me? |
Sigh. Girl, I know. I know. But don’t worry, there are ways to work this…
Hi Claire, I’m 69 years young and have been dating a man who is 67. We are both recently widowed.Hi Virginia; thanks for writing. My quick answer is yes, he loves you (yay!). Or at least he likes you an awful lot. I’m guessing he would pass the 10-question “Is This the Man For Me” test.
My question is he acts like he loves me but has never said he does. I know he texts and emails other women. I love him so much and I want to get married and he knows that. We see each other about 3x’s a week in which he drives 40 miles each way. When we eat out, he pays. He has introduced me to all his family members, but does this say he’s in love with me or wanting to marry me?
Should I just keep on dating to see if things change with our relationship or just call it off? Very confused and don’t know what to think. – Virginia
BUT! I think that’s not your REAL question.
Your real question is “If he loves me, why won’t he
a) tell me he loves me,
b) stop seeing other women, and
c) ask me to marry him?”
So I’ll tell you some straight-up answers to those questions, instead…
1. How men say “I love you”
Guys know that women want to hear the words, but that doesn’t always mean they’re good at saying them. Instead, men tend to show their love by DOING things for the woman they love.Driving 80 miles round trip several times each week just to take you for a late-night cappuccino and hot, buttery scones, or a sunrise breakfast at the pancake shop? Definitely “I love you.”
Still want to hear the words?
Try letting him know that you have a pretty good idea of what his feelings for you are, but that you would very much love to hear him say it sometime. You might be surprised at what a man will give you if you ask him sweetly!
2. Why a man will stop seeing other women to commit to you alone
If your boyfriend is seeing other women while you’re dating only him, you’ve already given up power in your relationship. Ideally, you want to casually date until you both explicitly agree to be exclusive.So unless the two of you have had an honest conversation about becoming exclusive, it’s unfair of you to think that he should just “know.”
Check out a recent article I’ve written about that on Digital Romance here:
–> How to talk to your man about commitment
3. How do I get him to pop the question?
This is going to sound weird, but the key here is to know what your timeline is. In other words, you need to know that you don’t want to invest more than 8 months, or 2 years (or whatever your timeline is) into exclusive dating unless you know this relationship has the potential to end in marriage.The second step is to communicate that timeline with your man.
I’ve written a step-by-step for you here:
–> How (EXACTLY) to tell him you want to get married
The result of setting your own personal timeline and communicating that in a casual and non-threatening way is clarity. He’ll know that if he waits too long, he risks losing you.
And, I’ll just add, he would be crazy to let do that.
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