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Marriage of convenience destroying lives

Derick Matsengarwodzi A MARRIAGE, in the by gone era was preceded by strictly observed courtship. In selected illustrations, courtship persi...

Derick Matsengarwodzi
A MARRIAGE, in the by gone era was preceded by strictly observed courtship. In selected illustrations, courtship persisted for years before the two finally settled.

In the Shona ethos, identified individuals played an integral part. This was a lifetime harmony so it compulsory planning. It also requests for endurance, sacrifice, tolerance and patience, among other facets.

Sadly, the majority of this has since vanished.

In its place are foreign concepts of online dating, love at first sight and marriages of convenience. If a matrimonial, if we can classify it thus, can only last a mere two months, then we really need to revisit the marriage institution once again.

The bible is explicit on marriage vows. (Genesis: 1: 24) says, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall they shall become one flesh.’

There is no other clear input regarding matrimony than the above statements. Some current marital trials arise amongst people who refuse to leave their previous parental connection as children, they reject weaning. Some newly weds desire to hang on to their comfort zone rather than pursuing the marriage body, fulfilling its purpose and learn each other without parental sway.

 Marriage of convenience destroying lives
The act of leaving their parents, partners acquire and explore means of survival, but in some instances they are spoiled from the onset by paying lobola, weddings and other provisions for them. Though appreciated, this act can be misused that marriage is a humanitarian concern not a lifelong union. Contrary, most people explore each other sexually that there is nothing left to study.

If a man departs from his parents, it does not translate he will financially starve them. Rather,parents will access assistance with the consent of the two; otherwise their interference will be catastrophic. Parental intrusion, even in sexual matters is regrettably rampant.Though the deed of exodus is hurting, it is necessary for all parties concerned. It eliminates dependence and creates independence. If possible, both parties should depart and leave parental possessions in order to claim a proper stake in the marriage.

Any outside offering should be regarded as a gift not an investment for future returns. This offers partners an opportunity and space to accumulate their own assets without interference. Becoming one flesh means sharing all, including secrets. It means one’s previous evils become collective because they may even affect future generations.

An organ cannot be amputated from the body; it will shut down the system. Every component is vital even minute, it is a symbiotic relationship. Every asset acquired becomes collective. An injury to one is injury to all. Any foreign object attracts an alignment and halts the smooth running of an existing matrimony. It will not surprise when one partner vehemently defends another even though the evidence points otherwise.

Relationships are not reserved for the egoistic.

(Philippians 2: 3) says, ‘Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself.’ There is no ‘I’ in marriage but only ‘we’. Everything exists to be shared, including the hard times. You must regard your partner better than yourself, and the same will relate to you.

(Ephesians 5: 20-21) further explains that, ‘Giving thanks always for all things to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, submitting to one another in the fear of God.’

When you submit to one another, you are not only promoting a lasting relationship but also respecting God’s law. Contrary, partakers of marriages of convenience believe that being submissive is weak, hence many marriages are crumbling. Submission also promotes zero tolerance to abuse, promiscuity, secretive conduct, use of witchcraft.Instead, harmony and love shall prevail.

The insurgency of small houses and its associate evils are in direct competition with God’s will. God will not bless a multiple union. He only recognises a bond between two only. Three is a crowd opening doors to infections. – Salvation Press News (SPN).
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